subscription discount "jus bacauz"

toddlers are random and so am I.

It occurred to me this morning, listening to Charlie have a mini breakdown over the breakfast options available to him that toddlers are so random and why should I not also be random? Why do they get to dominate this??

Yesterday we encountered my neighbor out on the sidewalk, and our two toddlers (mine = 4yo, hers = 3yo) (I think I’m not supposed to call mine a toddler anymore? I guess he’s more of a preschooler now but the distinction seems unnecessary at this point) were attempting to decide if they wanted to play together. They love each other and despite being literal next-door neighbors, we don’t get to see each other too often (insert generic “life is so busy” bullshit here iykyk) so the boys were thrilled to see each other. But there was conflict inside them! Charlie wanted to “go on an adventure” - his term for a walk around the neighborhood, and her kid wanted to go inside because it was cold outside. But ALSO they really wanted to play together outside. Like REALLY A LOT. What to do?!

It’s so hard to make decisions! Whether you’re three year’s old, or thirty-five year’s old, we all want our cake and to eat it too, a phrase I desperately hate yet makes so much sense I can’t NOT use it. I have yet to find a phrase to match it in meaning, other than “we want it both ways” which is boring as hell. Thanks Marie!

So anyway. I guess it’s just a quick anecdote about how kids ruin everything, they’re random af, and maybe you want access to a random-ass sale on subscribing to snarky memoirs? Substack is reader-supported, so your support (paid or otherwise) is super meaningful to me as i explore exploiting mine and other people’s children in my writing. It’s thrilling. I appreciate you!

Laterz!